Here's a question for Boomers to think about, especially those of us with small children:

How much of a commitment are you willing and able to make to help your aging parents?

Or to put it more bluntly:

How much of your lifestyle do you potentially give up so your mom and dad can lead the kind of life you ... or they ... think they should lead?

These are being asked in USA Today, and should have a number of us doing some hard thinking on the subject.

As the AARP's director of policy and strategy says, "We're still living in the fantasy that there are people at home who can take care of the elderly without giving up too much. We haven't caught up to the fact that most women are in the workforce."

I'll try not to bite at the tempting tidbit that smacks of chauvinism in that quote, as it is simply a matter of fact that 61% of people caring for elderly relatives are women. For them, the duty translates to a 41% forced cut in time spent in paid employment, and an average contribution of $2,400 out-of-pocket going toward care.

The president of a financial planning firm looks at the situation in less than cozy terms when he says, "At some point, the baby boomers are going to have to lay down the guilt. They need to worry about paying for college for their kids and saving for their own old age — which most haven't done."

Lay down the guilt. That's more easily said than done by people of a generation that have been raised to believe we've been provided the best of the best by parents who suffered through war and the Great Depression to give it.

There are some tips, however, that may make it easier to deal with the realities that come hand-in-hand with the fact that 41% of baby boomers with living parents are helping to take care of them, and 37% of those who aren't yet suspect they someday will.

First, encourage your parents to share their financial situation, and plans, well in advance of the day they'll need you to step in.

Second, if you have siblings, get them involved, as well.

Third, do not promise your parents that you will never put them in a nursing home.

Fourth, if you're thinking the folks may someday move in, start renovations early and spread them out. Check out the National Association of Home Builder's Certified Aging-in-Place Specialist program.

Fifth, look into long-term care insurance.

And finally, get your legal ducks in line by creating powers of attorney and such while everyone is healthy enough to participate in the process.

It's all well and good to focus on our little ones and to spend most of our worry energy on seeing them through to college, marriage, family and beyond, but ignoring the other end of our family spectrum could result in everyone's plans taking hits.